Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Offensive


Today, I was faced with a situation - I've thought about it, I've dreaded it, I've looked forward to it - and today I live it.

Part of blogging, is the ability to speak your mind, some dedicate their talents to just certain areas, I like to talk about all things that touch my life, my soul, my heart. I don't censor my thoughts -- I've never been given any reason to. What I think, I write...it's what I feel and I do it without remorse. In general, I don't have readers who are in my close circle of friends. Blogging is not a secret, but unless they ask I don't offer up where I'm at.

I find that it is kind of liberating to be able to speak my thoughts freely without worrying what someone close to me will think. Will they wonder if I'm strange because it's taken me 6 years to get over myself? Will they snicker because I struggle with my weight...which I've now made obvious what it is?

The Internet offers anonymity to speaking your mind, you can have feed back from others who don't know you and yet there are times we share some really personal stuff. My point is, for me at least...what is out there is real, no pretense, no fake smile so no one will ask questions, no shiny polished surface so I don't feel rejected...just me.

Today, I had my first encounter with someone offended by something that I'd written. At first I was bothered...not because I had written it, but because they were hurt - when never did I say anything hurtful about them. I didn't understand and I immediately went to defending myself and trying to explain my actions. It wasn't until after I started this process that I realized - I'm not sorry...if I'm not sorry then why am I explaining or defending my position?

I was not sorry for my words, only sorry for the way they were perceived by the reader (even though they were not directed at them.) So then what? Is having a friend or family member hurt by my writing about my feelings worth me censoring my thoughts?

What are you thoughts on having 'personal' people read what you write? Do you take that into account when you write you blog?

7 comments:

K.C. said...

Yeah, I am such a sissy. (I"ve got two brothers, so that is the word that I was always called). But, I am such a sissy that even at 41 , It would hurt my feelings still.

I guess try to see it from their point of veiw and help them get past it, maybe. THen the whole thing can be done... I dunno... Kayce

Kellan said...

EVERYONE I know knows and reads my blog - so I often have discussions in my real life about my blog. My Dad even often comments on my blog. I'm sorry you had this incident where there was a misunderstanding and you were put in this position - I KNOW HOW THAT FEELS!!!! Thanks for your support on my blog - you are becoming a great friend.

Take care and I'll see you soon - Kellan

Semi-Charmed Wife said...

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this situation--I just sent you an email... Hang in there!

April said...

I have both blog friends and real friends (and my hubby) reading my blog on a regular basis. I don't think I "censor" my thoughts and I would feel bad if someone was offended by what I wrote, but I wouldn't be sorry for what I wrote if it was not a direct insult to that PERSON. It's THEIR issue if they did not like something you wrote, not yours! (again as long as you weren't saying something negative about that person which I'm sure you weren't!)

Jenn said...

Well, that's the beauty of the private blog--I can block people who get too easily offended--and I have. ;-)

scrappysue said...

there's no point in having a blog (an online journal) if you can't speak your mind. your blog, your words. the thought that someone was offended can be difficult to deal with, but if they don't like what they see, there's always that little "X" in the top right hand corner.

DysFUNctional Mom said...

For a long time none of my family or friends knew about my blog (except hubby). I recently told my best friend & niece about it, but I don't think they read often. I wouldn't have to censor for them any way.
BUT, my ex-husband's wife found my blog and reads it. I definitely have to censor for her (we do not get along and she'd love to use info against me). And that sucks.
I do also have a blog that I just started for family & friends that will just be pics of the kids & tales of our day to day lives. Fluff. =)