He cheated! Rebuilding a marriage rocked by infidelity was a headline on msn about a woman who's husband cheated on her with another woman who shared their social circle. It caught my attention as I've been struggling with my own trust issues. No, I'm not saying that my hub is cheating, but recently his ex has begun sending business his way...business that has them spending more time on the phone than before.
I feel silly for even thinking...I mean, this woman doesn't live in the same state as us, not to mention I know my husband loves me. What this did, however was get me thinking about my marriage and how far we've come from where we started(which was a rather questionable place to begin with.) The University of Missouri posted
"Most spouses start out full of hopes and dreams and are truly committed to making their marriage work. Yet as the reality of living with a less than perfect spouse sets in and the pressures of life build, many individuals feel less romantic and do not find as much satisfaction in their relationships."
Less than perfect, of course, we are human. We lead busy lives; both work full-time jobs(he also a has a side job from home), have two energetic daughters, attempt to socialize with friends, and sustain some type of hobby/sport/individual activity. This coupled with balancing a marriage can leave the best of us feeling beat sometimes. I love the hub, but ever since the birth of our second daughter I've felt like things are off kilter. I'm not sexy enough, I'm not focused enough, I'm not fun enough. If only I could be the girl I was 5 years ago then perhaps.....sadly enough I am not, nor will I ever be again.
What has happened is the relationship has changed, we've changed - we've grown. There have been moments where we've grown together and moments where we've grown apart, but we have always supported each other. UofM states that "positivity, empathy, commitment, acceptance and mutual love/respect are the keys to making marriage/relationships last. I agree, this is not always easy for us to do, but we have always been willing to work on it. That much is still true today.
I guess what I struggle with the most is accepting that he loves me for who I am today and not who I was back then.
What have you learned about/from your relationships?