I became aware of Suzanne and her campaign for the 2008 Swimsuit Brigade (2 years running) shortly after I accepted the sexy challenge. "What a honest, self empowering, contradiction to what we see each and every day" I thought, but I would never do that. I, like most women out there, dread the summer months. No, not because it is hot - I actually look forward to the heat, longer days, the ability to play out doors and the variety of activities that become available for me and the family during this time of year. Unfortunately, as much as I enjoy the outdoors and swimming...I hate wearing a swimsuit. Once again, the battle scars that reflect the life (and love) I've had, make me want to hide myself in the shadows of a clothed body.
Seriously?
Yes, despite my last post (or any other previous information put out here) I am very self conscious of my body in a bathing suit. I can say that a lot of this self loathing for the way I looked started years ago with my first failing marriage. I hate to admit it (because I like to think I am mentally stronger than this) but I let this person mentally abuse me and belittle me and learned to hate my body because it was not the "perfect" size, it was not tight or toned or curvy or voluptuous or any of the other 'wants' he desired at that time. I have since come to terms that I will not be "perfect" however these things still lurk in the back of my mind. So in reality, while I can pose 'seductively' I do not feel as exposed as I do in a mere bathing suit.
Sad..I know. Hypocritical..possibly.
This is not to say that I don't believe this should be ignored or over looked just because I'm "shy." There are many of us out here who, for whatever reason (media, past experience etc.) believe we should be ashamed and cover up ourselves.
So today I am casting off my bathing suit cover up and joining the 2008 Swimsuit Brigade.
Will You?
8 comments:
Brave and beautiful. My wife always says that real men don't have washboard abs (she thinks that looks feminine on men - I'm glad, cuz my 6 pack is well insulated!)... similarly, I don't think beauty is defined in a specific way... beauty can be found in the light that shines from the eyes, the confidence of a smirk, a smile or a look of surprise... and not confined to having an ultra-thin or ultra-veluptuous or any other specific form that defines beauty...
to me, beauty is best defined in terms of one who accepts and enjoys their own being... the person is more than a body, although the body is certainly part of the person. So much focus can be bent to some specific image (almost always external) - it's what keeps so many plastic surgeons in business)... but again, I think beauty is an individual fully living in the moment and in who they were made to be, confident in their identity and being - as a whole and complete being...
J/
Kel, I think you look great! I don't own a swimsuit that fits at the moment. Still need to buy a non-maternity suit. You've motivated me to go shopping and face all those mirrors that will show me sides of myself I really don't want to see. Thanks! I think :)
You look great woman, and that swimsuit is rockin! But unfortunately I must reveal my own before and after photos, remember? I'm dreading it...you are so brave. When I wear my bathing suit, I look like a penguin.
First of all, kudos to you! It's such an empowering and awesome experience to let go of your inhibitions and reservations and put yourself out there--that's awesome!
Second--you look great! Love the cut. Adore the color. And the suit is doing great things for the "girls"... I'm just saying...
You look awesome! and how great that you took on this challenge too...it is so empowering like a pp said!
You look stellar. I understand your reason for feeling insecue though. Mostly because I was in a "verbally" abusive relationship for way too long.
But, if I looked like that in a swimsuit I would be happy.
Find that inner peace and take your words to head. you are a beautiful girl inside and out.
Me? No way. I'm not in shape for that....I may never be, and I'm ok with that.
You? Look great, and I'm sorry someone made you think otherwise.
I just saw this post! Good for you! I'm thinking about writing a post on this subject tomorrow (sans photo, for now).
http://zandria.us/
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